In the Pipeline finds fault with the US patent system: And Now for Something Completely Different
It's taken a team effort for things to come to this. Patent applicants have to write crummy applications; the patent office then does its part by granting way too many of them. And that leads up to this latest bolt of inspiration, whose examination by the PTO I would pay to witness. Prepare yourselves for US application 200400055535: "Process of Reincarnation."
The patent is really bad, which is all part of the fun:
Abstract: The invention consists of the process of reincarnation or rebirth resulting in immortality.
Description: [0001] This invention resulted from my combining Einstein's Theory of Relativity and Newton's Second Law of Physics.
[0002] Reincarnation is defined in Webster's Third New Inernational Dictionary as "rebith". Thus my invention is a process of rebirth or in other words immortality.